Adolph

From Wikiality

This was the last thing ever seen by the photographer.

Adolph is the point bear of the flying bear pack that drives the "Slay" of the Anti-Claus. He is literally a godless killing machine, being a cyborg bear manufactured by the clever elves of the terrorist organization the Elf'Qaeda. His nose emite a powerful laser which guides SCUD's and Taepodong missiles launched from the "Slay" to their unfortunate target.

[edit] Adolph the red-nosed polar bear

Adolph the red-nosed polar bear

has a very shiny nose

and if you ever saw it

your life would soon be in it's last throes

Muahaha!

All of the other polar bears,

used to laugh and call him names

until that godless Adolph

set their wicked asses aflame!

Then one foggy Christmas eve,

the Anti-Claus came to say,

Adolph with your nose so bright

won't you guide my "Slay" tonight?

Then all the bears honored him

And they shouted out evilly,

Adolph the red-nosed polar bear,

Let's go on a killing spree!

(Like Osama bin Laden!)