Daily Poll/Archive/August 2007

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[edit] August 28, 2007 - Not Gay Day

Appropriate Points, Airport Arrests gay, homosexual, Mitt Romney

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We are not gay! What? Oh. GOP Senator Larry Craig did not have sex with that man! Nor with any other men in any other bathroom. It's the super-powerful liberal Democrats decidering to:
Please vote below.
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There were 69 votes since the poll was created on 29 Aug 2007 15:39:07 UTC.

[edit] August 27, 2007 - Double 7 Lucky Monday

Legal points, Hating frenzy, John Ashcroft, Alberto Gonzales, Michael Chertoff

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Noooooo! The greatest Attorney General, even superer than John Ashcroft, Alberto Gonzales resigns (not quits, resigns). Fortunately, the Greatest President Ever has an exit plan:
Please vote below.
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There were 20 votes since the poll was created on 27 Aug 2007 16:12:16 UTC.

[edit] NATO terrorist tube war

Cyberwar points, War on Terror, Cyber Terrorist Panic, tubes, The Internets

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NATO is claiming that the Estonia cyberwar attack via the Internets is terrorism. NATO is really trying to:
Please vote below.
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There were 18 votes since the poll was created on 27 Aug 2007 17:29:04 UTC.

[edit] August 20, 2007

Shouting points, Rush Limbaugh, Oxycontin

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Pain pill use almost doubled from 1997, showing:
Please vote below.
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There were 29 votes since the poll was created on 20 Aug 2007 21:52:27 UTC.

[edit] August 19, 2007

Rewriting Points, Golden Iraq PSP. Input provided by General WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer

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With Karl Rove & Tony Snow soon gone, who can write General David Petraeus' September Assessment Of Iraq? The liberals think the General should. Petraeus's proper roll is to:
Please vote below.
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There were 19 votes since the poll was created on 20 Aug 2007 03:10:52 UTC.

[edit] August 18, 2007

Voting points, Wikipedia democracy, The O'Reilly DailyKos, Poor Tony, Diebold

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Now Tony Snow is resigning for "financial reasons". America-bashing liberals have, of course, suggested it's so he can pay child support to Jenna Bush. Can't we all just:
Please vote below.
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There were 17 votes since the poll was created on 18 Aug 2007 18:38:58 UTC.

[edit] August 17, 2007 morning sickness

Preggy points, Lick Me, Henry Hager, Jenna Bush provided by Senior Analyst WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer

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God bless America. After a week of mourning and battery licking to forget it, Forbes reports the Greatest Presidential Daughter Ever is engaged. They met:
Please vote below.
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There were 62 votes since the poll was created on 17 Aug 2007 15:52:02 UTC.

[edit] August 15, 2007

Growling Points, bears, Nancy Grace, Iran

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Oldest polar bear ever and it eats veggie dogs. This proves:
Please vote below.
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There were 23 votes since the poll was created on 16 Aug 2007 03:21:19 UTC.

[edit] August 14, 2007

Mourning after points

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Just a day after Rove announced his resignation, the world is falling apart - we discover Dennis Hastert will be retiring. The real reason, of course, is:
Please vote below.
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There were 21 votes since the poll was created on 15 Aug 2007 05:29:12 UTC.

[edit] August 13, 2007

Mourning points, History, Talk:Karl_Rove

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Karl Rove resigned today. The greatest president gave him his well deserved hug. Since we can't all hug him, we should:
Please vote below.
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There were 20 votes since the poll was created on 13 Aug 2007 22:35:52 UTC.

[edit] August 12, 2007

Poll Talking Points, Church guns, God's State, unicorns, Pledge Allegiance with the assistance of Senior Analyst WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer

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Atheists are the next terrorists. In Texas, they are trying to stop a minute of school prayer. In Missouri, they are actually using guns to shoot church goers. President Bush-Cheney need to immediately:
Please vote below.
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There were 20 votes since the poll was created on 13 Aug 2007 01:12:37 UTC.

[edit] August 11, 2007

Praise Xenu (and the The Lake Effect and WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer), no talking points to read tonight. If you're bored, you can read Mitt Romney.

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Republican Iowa Poll winner & war supporter Mitt Romney was not a troop, nor are any of his 5 sons troops. Praise?
Please vote below.
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There were 17 votes since the poll was created on 12 Aug 2007 06:53:27 UTC.

[edit] August 10, 2007

Poll Talking Points, Young Republicans, Iowa, inspiration provided by hot, nubile republicans WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer & The Lake Effect

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Republicans are fighting hard over a strong poll in Iowa this weekend. Their best strategy would be to:
Please vote below.
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There were 22 votes since the poll was created on 10 Aug 2007 23:26:29 UTC.

[edit] August 9, 2007 - cold!

Poll Talking Points, Lyme disease provided by Senior Analyst WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer

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America's stock market showed remarkable strength, only losing 390 points after learning:
Please vote below.
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There were 15 votes since the poll was created on 10 Aug 2007 01:50:46 UTC.

[edit] August 8, 2007 - hawt!

Poll Talking Points,hawtest ever, Brooklyn tornado, Virgin delivery to the other Stephen, research assistance provided by analysts The Lake Effect & WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBear

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Summer record temperatures yet again, Mormons skinny dipping in Salt Lake, and a tornado in Brooklyn have obviously been caused by:
Please vote below.
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There were 22 votes since the poll was created on 08 Aug 2007 23:50:02 UTC.

[edit] August 7, 2007

Poll Talking Points, FBI tube raid - research funding provided in part by the Tube Foundation

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US domestic flight delays are the worst in 13 years. This was caused by:
Please vote below.
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There were 15 votes since the poll was created on 07 Aug 2007 18:14:36 UTC.

[edit] August 6, 2007

Tube collapse causes poll shutdown.

[edit] August 5, 2007 - Bible Daily

Poll Talking Points, Wall Street Bibleprovided by Senior Analyst WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer

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Sunday newspapers are now allowing bible inserts (New Testatment only, of course). Future innovations for the Lord should include:
Please vote below.
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There were 19 votes since the poll was created on 05 Aug 2007 21:54:26 UTC.

[edit] August 1, 2007

Poll Talking Points provided by Senior Analyst WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer