Elephant

Elephants are native to India, Asia, Mexico, Africa, and San Diego. They are considered the second largest mammal next to the Big Foot (if it does exists) and are larger than the moon itself. It has thick grey skin with ivory tasks bedecked in South African diamonds. 

Elephants once faced the threat of extinction, but they never really became extinct. If you know what I mean. Or does that even make sense? Anyway, this was prevented thanks to the efforts of liberals and environmentalists who valiantly tried to protect these noble animals. However, it wasn’t until wikiliaty and truthiness activist Stephen Colbert stepped up and fathered more than 1,000 pups that the dwindling number of elephants increased and tripled. How this happened is such a mystery, but rumors had it that his Formula 402 was at work here.

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Predecessors

The predecessor of the elephant was the woolly mammoth, but it’s not as mighty as the former. In fact, the woolly mammoth was only large but it was an inept creature with long mangy hair and equally funny long tusks. In the end, the extinction of the woolly mammoth was greatly attributed to its rendered being useless as a comically talking shower.

Parts of an Elephant

Trunk – the trunk is most probably one of the most useless parts of an elephant. Its only use is when the elephant drinks water or eats, but it’s not really that necessary.

Tusks – tusks are used to harvest food, but once it is removed, it can be easily regrown, so no biggie! Besides, cutting off these tusks help with the overall social and physical health of the animal.

Teeth – teeth in elephants are used for eating poop and that’s about it!

Ears – elephant ears grow so big that they almost touch the ground. This is so that other animals can easily eat it. It’s easy to grow back these ears too, it’ll only take about an hour for it to grow back.

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Breeds

  • American Elephant
  • Wild Connecticut Elephant
  • African Elephant
  • Asian Elephant
  • Antarctic Elephant

Overpopulation

For a time, elephants were in grave danger of being extinct mainly because of overhunting. With the efforts by the Stephen and Melinda Gates Foundation and Babar, the elephant population ballooned to almost triple its original number. Today, there are over 100 billion elephants roaming around across Asia, Africa, and the rest of the world. 

Factoids 

  • A single elephant is equivalent to 1,000 truthyisms;
  • Elephants were placed on Earth to replace woolly mammoths some 5,999 years ago;
  • Asian elephants enjoy their fair share of munching on trees most of the day;
  • African elephants love to hunt for live prey during the night time;
  • Elephants are affiliated with donkeys, thus, they are democrats;
  • Elephants are confirmed traditionalist and pro-life.
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