Goldman Sachs

From Wikiality

Jump to: navigation, search
Goldman Sachs
has been granted full United States "citizenship"
for their donation to Republican causes.
America thanks you, Goldman Sachs
Goldman Sachs
is righteous and true
God Bless America


Goldman Sachs is a patriotic American business with a strong tradition of investing in other patriotic American businesses, especially when those American businesses are large multinational corporations.

Goldman Sachs receives a letter of thanks, describing its many contributions to America's greatness.
Goldman Sachs receives a letter of thanks, describing its many contributions to America's greatness.

Goldman Sachs is also well known for serving as one of the Minor League franchise teams of The Greatest Administration Ever.

Contents

[edit] Bushie Leaguers Move Up

To make the move up from the Sachs to serving at the pleasure of the President, one must have demonstrated the skills America has come to expect in her leaders: unflinching loyalty, the ability to follow blindly, and a willingness to take a huge paycut on paper in exchange for a lifetime of "perks." Some of the few, proud, members of the Bush Team to meet these criteria have included:

... and many more! While Goldman Sachs no doubt finds it difficult to lose so many of its top players (including positions from rising stars all the way up to former CEO Paulson) to the Bush Administration, they are always good sports. "We may not personally benefit," Goldman Sachs believes,"but as long as America wins, how can we lose?"

But we at Wikiality.com suspect that Goldman Sachs' patriotic loyalty will be rewarded with loyalty in kind, and that they may be surprised and pleased to see some of their old employees return through those revolving doors one day to pay them a visit!

[edit] Other Sachsers Who've Served

Goldman Sachs has also contributed fine upstanding Americans formerly in its employ to other posts within America's government, including all three of its CEOs preceding Paulson. Amongst these luminaries, you can find

[edit] Most Luminous of Luminaries

Perhaps the most notable of all Goldman Sachs alumni is "Mad Money's" own Jim Cramer.

[edit] External Links

Personal tools