Indiana Jones

From Wikiality

ATTENTION: This Page is for Real Americans™ ONLY
If you are not a Real American™, pack your bags and report to GITMO.

Indiana Jones (a.k.a. Indy; Kentucky; Alabama; and stuck-up, half witted, scruffy looking nerf-herder) is an American hero. He is the son of James Bond. And Jeopardy's greatest contestant Sean Connery.

[edit] Bad Ass Accomplishments!

Had sex more than any other man! (Except Colbert)

Made Damn Sure Nazi went back to Germany to cry in there sour krauts

Now aware of how awesome Indy is this poor Nazi is about to wish he was born Jewish!

Proved that the sword is actually extremely gay when it comes to bullets

[1]

And made America fully aware of Chinese labor forces with young children

He promises not to touch a thing Dr. Jones!

[edit] Fun Facts

Anytime you are at Skywalker Ranch, if you wake up with morningwood it's referred to as an Indiana Joner.

Chuck Norris is still not quit sure what to think of Indy other than if they join forces America would have the same impact as a nuclear weapon!