Operation Iraqi Freedom

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Operation Iraqi Freedom
Makes The Baby Jesus™ Happy
And that Makes Stephen happy, too!

We're not fighting for guys to not fight; we're fighting so guys will fight.

~ Stephen Colbert

The Colbert Report October 5, 2006

Now enjoying unprecedented freedom and security

Great war, or the greatest war?

Answer: There is no war. That's another lie of the liberal media. It's a humanitarian effort to restore freedom after Saddam went nuts. That's why the greatest president called it Operation Iraqi Freedom and not O.peration I.raqi L.iberation.

1 Cause
2 Resolution
3 A Note on Casualty Statistics
4 World War?
5 See Also

[edit] Cause

In March of 2003, the United States and Britain, and 87% of the nations of the world, invaded the nation of Iraq because there were WMDs, and most notably nucular weapons. George W. Bush, 43rd President of the United States of America, found this to be true because of highly reliable information (fact) gathered by the CIA and other efficient intelligence gathering agencies, such as Wikipedia.

[edit] Resolution

Because of the presence of the WMDs, President Bush, in clear accordance and support from the International Community as well as the UN, had no choice but to single-handedly invade Iraq preemptively to prevent Iraq from firing nuculer missiles at America. The choice for war, according to his Feb 22 2003 speech, was clearly "the choice of Saddam Hussein. Only he can decide if there will be peace or war."

On March 19, 2003, Americans and other troops from the Coalition began bombing the crap out of Baghdad. Saddam and all other Moo-slim terrorists were immediately rendered powerless. The Iraqi people greeted the Americans as liberators, exactly as Vice President Dick Cheney had predicted. The Iraqis danced in the streets, giddy with excitement because they would soon be participating in a perfectly democratic government and worshiping the Baby Jesus as newly converted Christians.

Mission Accomplished Baby!!! WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Operation Iraqi Freedom ended on May 1, 2003, less than two months after it began. In a speech aboard the USS Abraham Lincoln, Bush declared "Mission Accomplished", saying:

"In the Battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed."

Iraqis, Americans, and people all over the world cheered our great victory. George W. Bush could finally retire his flight suit after thousands of successful bombing runs in Iraq and get back to clearing brush on his ranch. Today, May 1st is a global holiday known as V-Day, or Victory over Iraq day.

After 9/11, the invasion of Iraq confronted the root cause of terrorism worldwide. By implementing the Bush Administration's strategy of confronting the root cause of the problem in the Middle East and the War on Terrorism, great advances have been made and won in this action. For example, no more textbooks in Iraq make hostile reference to the state of Israel, which in turn has created a region of stability and great advances in the war on terror.

Currently, nobody has been killed in Iraq who wasn't a terrorist; in addition, the Iraqi people now have the political ability to vote on leaders who will bring more stability to the region than Saddam Hussein, which we are now witnessing.

By directly removing Saddam Hussein from power, the region, and indeed, the world, have been made more stable and the world is clearly safer now than before 2003.

[edit] A Note on Casualty Statistics

All You Need To Know...

Total US deaths

WWI: 116,516
WWII: 405,399
Vietnam: 58,209
Operation Iraqi Freedom: 3,776
(as of 9/10/07)
Civil War: 23,000 in one day at Antietam!

Beware of the left wing spin machine when looking at the number of US troops killed during Operation Iraqi Freedom. Sensationalist spin-masters like the New York Times are just hyping up these body counts. Try putting things in perspective.

3,047 dead?! That's a drop in the bucket! And don't forget, not a single Iraqian civilian has been killed during Operation Iraqi Freedom! Now, doesn't that make you feel better?

And, if for some reason that doesn't completely comfort you, please keep in mind that bringing freedom and democracy to the heathen land is hard work. Really hard work. Hard, hard, really stinking hard, hard work. Like as hard as whitewashing a fence, or clearing brush from your ranch. Hard work.

[edit] World War?

The Iraq War is considered by most respected historians as WWII.LXXV, or 2.75. It was a precursor to the much larger, devastating, and catastrophic World War III - the Israel-Lebanon Conflict.