Irena Briganti

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Irena Briganti
is a Proud Republican Goddess
God Bless America
Bum's rush expert and well-wisher extraordinaire Irena Briganti
Bum's rush expert and well-wisher extraordinaire Irena Briganti

Irena Briganti, FOX News PR spokesperson, prognosticator, and Tony Snow's mentor, has been protecting the FOX homeland, including Bill O’Reilly, from the attacks of the liberal media for many years. It is not known for exactly how many years, because she has only recently stopped speaking anonymously, and begun openly proclaiming her American hero and pit bull status for FOX News Channel.

Her Career

First hired in June 1996 as a media take-a-hike coordinator, she was then promoted to senior director, media go-to-hell relations, then vice president, media go-f*ck-yourself relations for Fox News in April 2005. This true American patriot must be president of media eat-sh*t-&-die relations by now. Specifics on Irena are nearly impossible to find, so it’s hard to guess what title she is currently graced with. What’s not hard to guess, is what position she must have been in, over and over again, that precipitated her meteoric rise through and above the ranks of her male counterparts at FOX. “I’m at the top of my game now,” she was once quoted as saying “And I do like to be on top. It’s way better than staring at the ceiling all the time.”

Her witty putdowns have earned her a Tip of the Hat from Stephen Colbert, but that is only because she has not yet wished him wellor otherwise prognosticated on his bright future. The Baby Jesus would be ever so sad if Ms. Briganti ever thought to do so.

Getting ready to tell someone else off
Getting ready to tell someone else off

Records of her employment history at FOX are spotty at best. Only a few old pictures of her have been found.

Dancing With the Stars, completely overshadowing Tucker Carlson
Dancing With the Stars, completely overshadowing Tucker Carlson
Fox News employees sucking up to Irena, hoping she will not wish them well
Fox News employees sucking up to Irena, hoping she will not wish them well

Irena Briganti Factoids

  • Irena Briganti is unrepentant about wishing Anna Nicole Smith well on February 7th, 2007.
  • Based on the quantity of information and photos available about Irena Briganti, it is entirely possible that she is actually the alter-ego of Bill O’Reilly.
"Given the choice, it’s better to be viewed as a foot soldier for Bush than a spokeswoman for al-Qaeda."
  • Briganti responded to rumors that Bill O'Reilly would anchor the March 4, 2008, primary election night coverage by saying that, "The notion that O'Reilly would anchor election coverage of any kind is beyond absurd and wildly inaccurate." News professionals across the nation applauded her keen insight.


Irena Briganti
is a proud employee
of the Greatest Corporation of All--FOX!!!
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