Mother Nature

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Mother Nature
Makes The Baby Jesus™ Happy
And that Makes Stephen happy, too!


An autographed picture of Mother Nature, why it has the name "Dena Dietrich" on it, no one knows
An autographed picture of Mother Nature, why it has the name "Dena Dietrich" on it, no one knows

Mother Nature is God's wife. Afterall, if God wasn't married, that would make Jesus a bastard. Nixo-facto, Mother Nature is God's wife.

Liberals who say that God isn't married want to perpetuate the lie that God is an unmarried bachelor well past his prime, like George Clooney.

In addition, because George Bush is a direct descendant of Jesus, Bush and Mother Nature are related. This accounts for their uncanny resemblance.

[edit] Mother Nature Factoids

  • Has an infallible BS detector.
  • Does not have a sense of humor.
  • Never has to poo, fart or spit.
  • Always has a birdie flying around her, and a squirrel or bunny at her feet.
  • Is lactose intolerant.
  • Mothered the Heat Mizer and the Snow Mizer.
  • Is also the Holy Spirit, which is how she met her husband.
  • Has the biggest knockers in history known as the grand tetons.
  • makes communists run to horrible places like canada

[edit] See Also




This article is a stub. You can get a Tip of the Hat* from Stephen by adding only truthiness to it.
*Tip of the Hat not guaranteed.
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