Neoconservatism

Neo Conservatism are conservatives with big muscles and they watch over us like a Big Brother. They flex their muscles to protect democracies around the world. The Neoconservatives are so right that their rightness doesn't even make sense to most people. But they are right.

[edit] Preemption

A neoconservative is a conservative that believes the best way to maintain tradition is by radically changing the world so that Mcnuggets are available to free loving patriots all over. They believe in the holy doctrine of preemption and strike at any Enemy of Freedom before they declare war.

The basic tenets have an internal logic that is so simple and logical that it can confuse people. So, if you are confused by this explanation perhaps you just don't think simple enough. Here goes:

1. Neocons believe that America is a gift from God. God has blessed America and we we have to pay our blessings forward.

2. How do we best pay our blessings forward? We export our freedom for the enjoyment of the heathen who God has not blessed enough to have our Freedom.

3. Sometimes the heathen are so confused that they disagree with our freedoms and side with the terrorists. These people need to be bombed.

4. We bomb the terrorists and freedom is exported. The terrorists lose and America wins. The terrorists see this, quake in fear and repent for their sin.

5. We all eat Chicken Mcnuggets and drink snapple because we have the freedom to choose to.

[edit] Big Brother is Watching

Neo Conservatives believe in giving more power to the intelligence agency to watch over us and protect us from domestic home-grown Enemies of Freedom.

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Categories: Righteous | American | Cons