Stephen and the Colberts
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This band is so much better than the Decemberists it's not even funny. The first time I saw them I was pronounced legally dead for approximately 37 seconds because I was overwhelmed with equal doses of sock rocking and truthiness, with a little dash of Charlene.
Stephen and the Colberts was a famous band known for their crazy shoes and tie clips. Their music was seen as sub-standard, but that was because the nay-sayers didn't have PhDs. Sadly, The Colberts died in a horrible fire, and only Stephen remained. He swore to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but complete truthiness from then on. The Band was just signed to RCA Records by Clive Davis, making him a Jewish, American hero.
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[edit] History
Founded by front man Stephen Colbert in 1984, Stephen and the Colberts epitomized 80's music. A Reporter for Rolling Stone magazine described them as "hotter than The Beatles having sex with Cher." Despite the baffling nature of this comment, it was generally accepted that the Colberts - and in particular their guitarist/vocalist Stephen - were rock gods.
In the spring of 1986, following the release of their hit single Charlene (I'm Right Behind You), the band came under criticism. Stephen's ex-girlfriend Charlene (on whom the song is based) filed a restraining order against the rock star. Although the band managed to bounce back with a popular Christmas album, their reputation was forever damaged and they disbanded within a year.
"Stephen And The Colberts" was, in all actuality, the first punk band. Though often thought to be another stereotypical 80's synth band, Stephen [And The Colberts] was too often overlooked by the mainstream media for their impressive and intense collective and collaborative efforts with The Sex Pistols, The Ramones, The Clash, and every punk band ever invented that didn't royally suck.
Unfortunately, their one mainstream hit was their least favorite song: a ballad written to try and woo ex-lover Charlene back into lead singer Stephen's arms with the only sort of music she had the mental capacity to appreciate. This song has lived on in infamy as "Charlene (I'm Right Behind You)".
The underground, however, has long been aware that Stephen And The Colberts was one of the most influential punk bands of any time.
As one of Stephen's many champions has stated,
"The world has never been ready for the intense, in your face vulgarity of Stephen's unadulterated punk rock manimal lust. And until they are, Stephen will always be remembered for that bullshit song about Charlene. I hear Charlene is selling autographed pictures of herself on ebay. If she hadn't of broken Stephen's heart she could be living fat. Now she knows better. Bet she wished she did then."
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