The Colbert Report/Episodes/Season3/April
From Wikiality
[edit] Season 3 (2007) April
| # | First aired | "The Wørd" | Studio guest | Introductory phrase | Prod# |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 238 | 4/9/2007 | none | Colin Beavan / Katrina vanden Heuvel | "Christos Anestis!" | 3045 |
| Stephen welcomes Colin Beavan, patriarch of the eco-Manson Beavan Clan, who have given up almost everything in an effort to have no environmental impact on the planet. He also welcomes Satan's Second Wife, Katrina vanden Heuvel. | |||||
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| 239 | 4/10/2007 | Hip Replacement | Jeannette Walls | "Turn-offs: Phony people. Turn-ons: People who watch my program. And sex." | 3046 |
| Stephen welcomes Jeannette Walls, freelance writer and author of The Glass Castle: A Memoir, exploring her childhood with homeless parents. | |||||
| 240 | 4/11/2007 | Season Pass | Vali Nasir | "The Colbert Promise: If you don't like this show, your money back. (Cable fees not included.)" | 3047 |
| Stephen welcomes the professor of Middle East and South Asia politics and author of The Shia Revival: How Conflicts within Islam Will Shape the Future, Vali Nasr. | |||||
| 241 | 4/12/2007 | Body Armor | Dr. Richard Land | "Welcome to the Monkey House." | 3048 |
| Stephen welcomes the President of the Southern Baptist Convention’s Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission & author of The Divided States of America?: What Liberals and Conservatives Are Missing in the God-And-Country Shouting Match, Dr. Richard Land. | |||||
| 242 | 4/16/2007 | Clean Slate | Senator John Kerry | "Some parts of tonight's show are void in Alaska and Hawaii." | 3049 |
| Stephen was fighting a cold and decided to share it with Taxachusetts Senator and author of This Moment on Earth: Today’s New Environmentalists and their Vision of the Future, John Kerry. | |||||
| 243 | 4/17/2007 | Plan B | Elaine Pagels | "I'd never get a $400 haircut. I'd get $100 haircuts four times a week." | 3050 |
| Stephen provides more details about his adopted daughter Stephanie Colburtle the Turtle, threatens Sean Penn before the April 19, 2007 Metaphor-Off, wags his mighty finger and welcomes scholar and author of Reading Judas: The Gospel of Judas and the Shaping of Christianity, Elaine Pagels. | |||||
| 244 | 4/18/2007 | Branding | Paulina Porizkova | "If you're watching from outside your coverage area, this is a $10 co-pay." | 3051 |
| Stephen welcomes supermodel, author, and wife of The Cars' Ric Ocasek, the lovely Paulina Porizkova. | |||||
| 245 | 4/19/2007 | $400 Haircut | Sean Penn | "A dozen means 12. Learn to count, bakers." | 3052 |
| Stephen faces off against Hollywood liberal Sean Penn in the Metaphor Off!, hosted by former US Poet Laureate Robert Pinsky. | |||||
| 246 | 4/23/2007 | none | Mike Huckabee, Russell Simmons | "The weather's warmed up, and I'm showing some skin." | 3053 |
| Stephen welcomes hip-hop mogul DJ Mike Huckabee and author of Do You!: 12 Laws to Access the Power in You to Achieve Happiness and Success, Russell Simmons. | |||||
| 247 | 4/24/2007 | Act Globally | Dr. Andrew Weil | "Happy 2nd anniversary Pope Benedict XVI. You'll always be Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger to me." | 3054 |
| Stephen welcomes the author of Healthy Aging, Dr. Andrew Weil. | |||||
| 248 | 4/25/2007 | Sacrifice | David Walker | "They found a new Earth-like planet! Drive that Hummer all you want." | 3055 |
| Stephen welcomes the head of the Government Accountability Office David Walker. | |||||
| 249 | 4/26/2007 | Mending Wall | Tom Wolfe | "Happy National TV Turnoff Week, you hypocrites!" | 3056 |
| Tonight, Stephen welcomes author Tom Wolfe. | |||||
| 250 | 4/30/2007 | none | Bill Bradley / Neil deGrasse Tyson | "It's the last day of April. One more month 'til Speedo season. Do your squats!" | 3057 |
| Tonight, Stephen welcomes former New Jersey Senator and author of The New American Story, Bill Bradley. Plus, astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson will help Stephen plan his conquest of New Earth. | |||||
