Thomas Jefferson

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Thomas Jefferson
Has been featured on "The Colbert Report"
as a part of the "Better Know A Founder" segment.

For a charming negress, you have a fine rear carriage. Tappage will ensue.

~ Thomas Jefferson

Three minutes prior to the tappage, somewhere in Virginia

Thomas Jefferson was our nation's third President. He is best known for being featured on the Better Know A Founder segment during the November 15, 2006 episode of The Colbert Report.

Sallie Hemmings' Strom Thurmond

[edit] "America's Next Top Jefferson"

Project Runway's Tim Gunn checks out the "Thomas" wannabes, "Jefferson two, you are funereal."

[edit] Descendants

Movin' On Up!

Thomas Jefferson has many black descendents since he slept with a slave and fathered many children. These childer later assembled the NAACP, and most live in California. They were the founders of San Francisco.

Among President Jefferson's black descendents is William Jefferson, that Democrat who stole money and hid it in his freezer.

[edit] Factoids

Boned Sallie Hemmings.
Grew industrial-strength hemp, meaning that he was a Libertarian.
Is on the nickel.
Went to South Africa, which might not be a real place, to stop the Vegemite crisis.